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I've been looking forward to doing this set for many months now, but wanted to finalize the details first. Now - I have begun.
This is the set of the "Deadly Sins" and how they personally are evident in my own life. I'm trying to make this as honest as I possibly can - and really show you the dark places in my soul.
For those of you who are unfamiliar with the Deadly Sins, they are as follows:
Avaritia - Greed
Invidia - Envy
Socordia - Sloth
Ira - Wrath
Superbia - Pride
Luxuria - Lust
Gula - Gluttony
Also included in one of the original lists of Deadly Sins was Tristitia - Despair.
The first sin that I plan to cover is "Invidia" or "Envy". I had to think for a long time about all the different ways envy influences me. Polyamory can definitely make me envious. Anytime my lover is with another woman, it is easy to feel envious. There have been many moments when I've thought to myself, "Why does she get to sleep/dance/talk/etc. with him right now and I don't?" But I find that over the last few months, that particular form of envy has been fading significantly.
What is always with me is "body insecurity". Even though I like to think that I'm much healthier now than I EVER have been in the past, I still know that I have poor self-esteem from time to time, and it influences my behavior. Sometimes I'll want to eat something and I'll keep myself from eating it because I'm afraid of getting fat. Or I'll look at a girl at tango and just be sick with envy of her legs and perfect stiletto feet and gorgeous hair.
So, my portrayal of envy is envying the superior beauty of others. Of being influenced by the portrayal of beauty in the media and allowing it to warp my own body image. Of feeling the need for makeup/a certain style/dieting to feel beautiful. I think this is very wrong, but I don't think it's entirely the fault of the girls involved. Our media is purposely marketing an ideal of beauty to today's youth that is almost guaranteed to make some people feel bad about themselves. Beauty products and fashion magazines are there to help convince women that they are not good enough AS THEY ARE. That they're not beautiful unless they are 90 pounds, can fit in a size 00, wear a certain brand of mascara, and never leave home without their lipstick.
Ladies, we're all beautiful just the way we are. Whether we're blond or brunette, skinny or curvy, tall or short. Let's stop envying others (especially magazine models) for what they supposedly have that we don't. They aren't reality and WE are.
I'd love to hear your thoughts. :)
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By: Tangolarina
Taken: January 1, 2005
Uploaded: April 4, 2010
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